Faith, Flashbacks
& Finding my Freaking Peace
"It took me five decades of life to realize this personal truth: God really did give us everything we need. Sometimes, we just forget to pick up our basket."
I’m not here to impress you with my faith. Truth be told, I’ve preferred to keep it tucked away—selfishly, quietly, like something delicate I wasn’t quite ready to explain. But if I’m going to be honest and I’ve promised myself that I will be, then I have to come out of the faith closet, and be fully who I am. That includes my belief, my journey, and yes… my relationship with God.
I was raised to fear God, not feel God. Add in some Catholic school drama trauma, and I grew up believing I was unworthy of grace before I could even spell it. Faith felt like a members-only club where I didn’t meet the dress code.
Then came the shifts—menopause, heartbreak, disappointment, and a spiritual identity crisis with a side of hot flashes. I tried every healing modality under the sun (and moon), but nothing stuck… until I got real with God. No middlemen. Just me, raw and ready.
Turns out, it’s not about being the “perfect Christian” (insert any other faith, religion or belief system here), or checking boxes. It’s about having a messy, beautiful, personal relationship with something bigger—even if you drop an F-bomb on occasion.
This is when my lens changed. I stopped asking "Why me?" and started asking, "What now?"
I found peace not in perfection, but in presence.
I stopped being a human sponge for everyone else’s pain.
I reclaimed my softness, but with steel in my spine and purpose in my pocket.
I’m not here to preach. But I will whisper this:
Try Jesus or seek your Higher Power.
Try connection.
Try letting go of what never worked in the first place.
Know too, that you’re not too late.
You’re not too broken.
And no, you don’t need to have it all figured out.
You just need to be brave enough to start your own conversation with God—cuss words, doubts, questions and all.
And if you need a safe place to heal, reset, and feel again, well… The energy of WhileWoods restored me, and maybe, just maybe, it is waiting for you too.